"Whoooo's my little burnie-wurnie pooh-pooh? Yoooou are! Yes, yoooou are!"

You Are 81% Burned Out

You are extremely burned out. You work too hard, and you're not getting the results you deserve. It's time for a life change, as soon as you can manage it. You're giving away most of your energy to something you don't even enjoy.

("Something you don't even enjoy" is not the blog, if you were wondering.)

I went out to run some errands this afternoon. My first stop was the post office, to mail off a book to a new reader. However, something wasn't quite right. The self-serve postal meter was stuck loading Windows XP.

 

The caution tape around the broken kiosk was a nice touch. As if to say "we don't know what this damn thing will do next." Anyway, I did what any sensible person would, I threw a tantrum and demanded to see the manager. Just kidding. I bought a big glob of stamps from the old-fashioned stamp vending machine, and went about my business. But then, when I went to the bookstore, I saw another malfunctioning kiosk, this one running Windows 98.

At this point, I was kicking myself for not bringing my real camera. However, it wasn't until I got home that the kicking began in earnest. Kicking, screaming, and a bit of thrashing about on the floor. You see, I thought a nice session of Rock Band would finish out the busy day nicely. But when I fired up the 360, I got some bad news.

Meaning: "I'm sorry, you'll have to get a new one."

I just discovered this delightful Blog Post Generator. It's not a random blog post generator, unfortunately. Still, if you're in a pinch and you want to blame your lack of recent posts on global warming, waiting for a gentleman to propose, or a lack of prosthetic hands, you may be in luck as this example shows:

Holy crap! I just had a terrible scare when I thought I have not updated this since I had to start working to pay the ridiculous food and petrol prices to feed my kids... You would not believe that my hands were chopped off and I was waiting for bionic ones. Stupid Global Warming!
I am absolutely consumed with waiting for a fine young gentleman to propose, watching Dexter, just generally being a doormat to my employer, my day pisses me off from the second I am woken by murderous Teletubbies to well after sun-down. I am plotting and planning. I need a nap.
I totally promise I will make more of an effort to blog more often until the nice men in the white coats come back. Well, I'll try. Unless of course the pool with the cocktail bar is heated!

They say that if you go to bars to meet people, you'll meet people that like to hang out in bars. If you want to meet people that enjoy, oh I don't know, square dancing, then you should go to a square dance. I don't particularly like hanging out in bars or square dancing, but I do enjoy a casual board game— I've got a closet full of them— so I went to The Center for their monthly game night. And, guess what? I had a fun time and met a bunch of nice people. I am so going again next month.

In the meantime, I'm packing my bags for a trip to the Bay Area this weekend. I'll be spectating at a wedding rather than taking a real vacation, which as I am sure you will agree, I am long overdue. But, my brother and his daughter will be there and it will be nice to spend some time with them. And then after that, it will be back to the daily grind. Whee!

Amazingly, my first post on this blog was on August 8, 2006. I don't think that would have expected, back then, for this project to have carried on this long, but I'm pleasantly surprised that it has. This blog was originally started as a way for friends to keep track of me, and then for me to share details of other projects and such that I might be engaged with, and also for me to share obscure, hard-won information with the Web in general. Over time, the meaning of the blog has changed, and today, I'm hard-pressed to say whether The Electronic Replicant really has any unifying theme, other than just being a collection of things that I find interesting. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Anyway, I'd like to thank each and every reader (yes, even you) who provided the comments and feedback that made this project seem worthwhile. Thank you, and here's to another 365 days online.

Friday

The trip up to the Bay Area went just about as smoothly as I've ever seen it. I had ticketless travel and no bags to check, just two carry-on items, so getting into the airport was pretty fast. Once inside, the line for security was a mile long, but eventually they were able to sufficiently scrutinize my sneakers. Then I had to go up the escalator in my socks, since there weren't benches enough for everyone to put their footwear back on. Oh, and the men's room was closed for renovations. But there were two teeny-tiny substitute lavatories way back down under the stairs in a grim employees' area. Upon seeing them, I decided I'd rather go once I was on the plane, thank you.

Once I arrived in Oakland, I went to pick up the rental car and was nearly charged for four days of use instead of two. Fortunately, that was easily straightened out, and I was soon on my way to the East Bay. In early rush-hour traffic.

All right, so perhaps the getting there wasn't all that smooth after all. And no sooner did I check into the motel than was I bothered by work. Fortunately, it was something utterly trivial. No sooner was that concluded than did my uncle show up, so we went to a chain diner across the street and had burgers. And no sooner did we finish that than did my aunt show up and recruit the both of us into making party favors.

Saturday

I set out to buy some new dress shoes, since the ones I had were so beat up I that I didn't bother to bring them. So, after a bagel and an odd cherry-flavored coffee, I ended up going to Wal-Mart, since that was what was in the neighborhood, and I did find a pair of shoes that would do if nobody looked at them too closely. I also picked up a set of instant shoe-shine wipes and a pack of batteries, but those somehow didn't make it into my bag. I didn't notice this until well after I got back to my motel. Arrgh! I swore (profusely) never to return to that store again. But...

When I went to go pick up my brothers and my Dad from their hotel, it turned out that my youngest brother didn't even have a dress shirt. And since that particular Wal-Mart was the only store (that we knew of) in the area that sold clothing...

Anyway, we made it to my cousin's wedding just in time. I've only been to a handful of weddings, but this one had the most elaborate ceremony (I'm glad I thought to put on sunscreen), the most elegant venue, and the most guests I've ever seen. The food at the reception was pretty darn good, too. I even made an attempt at dancing.

Sunday

My family decided to meet for breakfast before we all went our separate ways again. When we discovered that a plate of eggs was $26 at the hotel restaurant, we decided to go to Denny's instead. After the meal I still had about an hour before I had to return to Oakland, so my brothers and I went to a nearby park for a bit before saying our goodbyes.

My trip back to San Diego went a bit less smoothly than the trip to Oakland. Not only were the terror screeners being particularly meticulous, I had the worst $10 turkey sandwich. First of all, it was actually tuna salad. Then, for some reason the sandwich maker put lettuce on both sides of the sandwich, which caused the filling to slither out from between the slices of bread like some sort of alien embryo.

On the way home from the airport, I stopped and saw the new Mummy movie. The theater was practically empty, a bad sign. I wouldn't say the movie was bad, but it certainly wasn't what I'd call great. Another bad sign was that people actually laughed at the "Please be quiet during the movie" announcement. It seemed like everybody in that theater was talking. I know, because I changed seats to get away from one group of blabbermouths, only to end up next to the bozo that answered his cell phone during the movie. I'm never going to the Mission Valley 20 theater again.

Monday

Monday was supposed to be the recovery from travel day, but interrupted by more utter trivia. *sigh* But something good did come out of Monday, and that was that the return shipping carton for my red-ringed 360 finally arrived. I packed up the 360 and took it to the UPS store. The clerk there seemed to know exactly what I was dropping off. "How many times have you sent it back?"

"This is the second time," I said.

"Okay. I know some people have sent theirs back three, sometimes even five times."

At least I still have the Wii, right?

I'm uninspired, so it's time for the Weather Meme.

A meme inspired by an unseasonably hot day yesterday. It's my meme so I get to make the rules, which means that there are no rules. Change the questions, add questions, do whatever the hell you want. It's so damned hot here that I won't care.

How do you cope with hot weather?

I believe that the secret is to just get used to it. Staying out of the sun is also a good idea.

When does the heat make you most crazy?

When it's too hot to even sleep.

Where do you go to get air conditioning?

I have an air conditioner in my living room, and I am not afraid to use it.

Your favorite place to sleep in hot weather?

Surrounded by fans. Electric fans, not grown men in Stormtrooper costumes. (That's for cold weather.)

Your favorite hot weather food?

A few weeks ago, I made the most delicious chicken kebabs, with onion, pineapple, red bell pepper and yellow rice on the side. I should have made them again tonight.

Your favorite people to visit in the hot weather?

People who live somewhere not so hot? But seriously, I'll tell you who I won't visit. People who have no air conditioners, but who shut up their houses tight to keep in "morning coolness" but who also turn on incandescent lights, TV's, and the stove. Yeah, that makes perfect sense. You know what would make it even better? If they were smoking. Yeah... I'll just be outside. It may be ever so imperceptibly warmer outside, but at least it's not stuffy.

Your favorite way to wear your hair in the hot weather?

I'm not sure, but "gone" sounds pretty tempting.

Your favorite hot weather drink?

I should really say plain old water, but there's nothing like a really good iced tea or real homemade lemonade.

Is hot weather good for anything?

Hot weather accomplishes many things, but I'm not sure any of those are particularly good. For example, it dries out vegetation which can become a fire hazard later in the year, it raises the demand for electricity because of all the people staying home and firing up their air conditioners and television sets, and it can even kill people that don't have air conditioners. It also makes me appreciate the milder seasons a lot more. Hooray, autumn!

q. Dear wise, merciful, and all-knowing Electronic Replicant, whose wisdom is matched only by his generosity, whose generosity is matched only by his patience, and whose patience is matched only by the contents of my numbered Swiss bank account,

I find myself in the unenviable position of having to use Microsoft Word. Furthermore, I have to apply the strikethrough effect to text seemingly at random. I have been assured by other sources that there is no keyboard shortcut to do this, unless I want to create a thing called a macro. That sounds to be far too complicated and scary a task for one such as myself, who desires simply to complete one tedious task, not to compound it with bells, whistles, and other fooferaw. You know about computers, surely there's something you can do?

a. Although I'm flattered by your elaborate groveling, it's not necessary. This is the Electronic Replicant, not the Usenet Oracle.

But seriously, anybody who tells you that you must create a macro if you want to use the keyboard to apply the strikethrough effect is lying. In fact, there is a keyboard shortcut for strikethrough. It's ALT-OFK, [Enter]. This pulls down the Format menu, chooses Font, checks Strikethrough, and then applies the effect, all in four easy keystrokes.

You can apparently also do the same thing in three complicated keystrokes: CTRL-D, ALT-K, [Enter], but I find it easier just to hold down ALT and type OFK than to switch modifiers.

Now, about that Swiss bank account...

Now Reading: The Shockwave Rider

Just Finished: Pandora's Star

Books that tell several interweaving stories at once can be quite interesting. If the author is a storyteller with an impeccable sense of pacing who can throw in creative cliffhangers where appropriate, such a book can be quite a page-turner. Unfortunately, if one of the threads is less than interesting, then finishing the book can become quite a chore. In this case, the chore may have been in vain, since this book was quite obviously written to kick off a series. Very little was resolved by the end— quite disappointing.