With the last weekend of November all but over, those of us participating in NaNoWriMo are either almost done or have long since given up. However, for those of us who’ve got that strange mixture of tenacity and procrastination that finds us with two days left to write fifty thousand words (or suffer the shame of defeat) there is a way out: automation!
Balderdash, you say? Wondermark has created the Electro-Plasmic Hydrocephalic Genre-Fiction Generator 2000, a coal-fired marvel which weighs four thousand pounds and produces six hundred books per year. Carbon-neutral or not, it provided me with this intriguing synopsis for the price of but two pence four pence a bent paperclip and a swift kick to the boilerplate:
“In a shrill Victorian Britain, a schlub with mild OCD comes across a crazy old man, which puts him into conflict with forces that encourage conformity. He is joined in his quest by a tomboyish female mechanic and her reference book, culminating in authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters.”
Flabbergasting! We’re as good as done!
There are only a few minor details to iron out. For example, I might desire a suitable nom de plume under which to publish my putative magnum opus. Fortunately, that’s as good as done. I shall be known as…
Captain Manscape Stalin
Oh. Oh, dear. That’s not quite what I had in mind. What say we try again…? (Ahem) I shall be known as…
Hollis Poe Rochambeau
Bully good, but let us perhaps shorten it to H. Poe Rochambeau. Sounds more mysterious and more literary that way. Now there remains another last detail to attend— a cover! Have no fear, ’tis easily remedied. A bit of this and a bit of that, and voilà:
You see? As good as done. Time to browse the internettery!