The Electronic Replicant

Pretentious Blogging

Hark and forsooth, dear beloved Reader, and fain welcome to Your Humble Servant’s abode, wheretofore the wandering eyes of one and all shall behold literary eructations of uncommon erudition, remarkable pulchritude, and extraordinary sesquipedality.

Lest Your Humble Servant descend into alexic logorrhea, let us hereupon galeoflect to Sunday Stealing. Henceforth, let us commence.

Pretentious Blogging Meme: Part Two.

(Part One Of Which Shall Be Performed At Date Yet To Be Determined)

pre·ten·tious: 1. Claiming or demanding a position of distinction or merit, especially when unjustified.; 2. Making or marked by an extravagant outward show; ostentatious.

How many drafts of potential blog posts do you have right now?: I will have you know that I have no less than a dozen posts in draft state.
In what medium do you draft your posts?: Why, electronic, of course. One might agree that there are are bloggers who may well draft their posts with pencils on paper notepads, but then one might be led to wonder whether there might be other bloggers who draft their posts on vellum and parchment with quills dipped in iron gall ink.
How often do you completely scratch or delete drafts or blog post ideas?: More often than not. Most drafts reveal themselves, in the fullness of time, to be nothing other than pure and utter balderdash.
If you had to leave your blog in your will to another blogger, who would you choose?: Who wouldn’t want the honor, the distinction, the privilege of becoming The Next Electronic Replicant? Why, one would assume that because such a multitude of bloggers would beg for the position, that choosing among them through conventional means such as soliciting résumés would prove impractical. For this reason, I would will the title of The Next Electronic Replicant to the winner of a grueling twenty-two week television contest of talent, poise, pretension, fabulosity and outrageousness, with final determination to be made by audience participation.
Are there other blogs that you feel are similar to yours in content, style, or voice?: No. There are only pale reflections, faint echoes, and breezy redolences. For it was none other than I who invented this style, voice, and content. I am the artist from whom all inspiration flows. Oh, and I invented blogging. And the Internet. And the computer, and the vacuum tube, and electricity.
Has anything surprised you since you started blogging?: Indeed. I had assumed that surely I would never lack for anything to say.
What are your goals or plans for your blog going forward?: To carry onward, to entertain and connect with other bloggers.
Do you make any money from your blog? (optional) about how much a month?: Imperntinent scoundrel! Were I to gain monetarily, in how poor taste would it be to express it in preening, flaunting self satisfaction. Fortunately, this project is conducted upon a strictly for-fun basis.
What blogging system do you use?: Once upon a time, I used a Java application called Thingamablog. Sadly, it developed problems which precipitated a migration to WordPress.
How did you come up your blog name?: Ridiculous as it may seem, it was generated by computer. ERIK is the cybernetic acronym for Electronic Replicant Intended for Killing. This was first used the blog’s tagline— another title was under consideration and was fortunately rejected. Lest the public be unsettled by references to violence, the Intended for Killing was thenceforth omitted.
How many blogs do you have? What was your peak?: I admit only to this one.
Are you having as much fun as when you started?: On occasion, indeed, but oft times are they that putting thought to word seems both duty and chore.
Where do you find other bloggers like you?: Patiently perambulating comments and blogrolls and trackbacks. On occasion in participating in blogging events e.g. NaBloPoMo, Holidailies, ICLW, et cetera.
What’s your one wish when it comes to blogging?: Simply that I always continue to have as much fun as (or more than) when I started.

Desktop Friday: Moon

What’s on your desktop this week? I’ve got the moon.

This image was the APOD for January 2nd. Although it shows a partial lunar eclipse as well as the elusive Blue Moon, the thing that I most like about this image is that it almost looks as though the moon is in front of the clouds. But clearly, that’s an illusion. Who would photoshop the moon in front of the clouds? Nobody but the merest beginner would do that. This must therefore be an authentic optical illusion.

Now Reading – Feb 4

Now Reading: Eyes of the Calculor by Sean McMullen.

Just Finished: Running with the Demon by Terry Brooks.

Terry Brooks is well known for his fantasy series, Shannara. Some years ago, I received a three-in-one Shannara compilation. I eventually sat down to read it to see what all the fuss was over. Unfortunately, I just couldn’t get into it and abandoned it, I would guess, about a third of the way through the first book. I remember some people trying to cross a bridge or something. It’s still on my shelf, just in case I ever find myself wondering whatever happened next.

However, I never thought to wonder whatever happened before that. It seems that there is a prequel to Shannara called Genesis of Shannara, and there is a prequel to that called The Word and The Void, and it was this last that came highly recommended to me. And by highly recommended, I mean something along the lines of, “Hey, I know an author you might like, and here’s his book, which I just happen to have brought with me.”

With a recommendation like that, how could I refuse? Without once again coming off as astonishingly rude, of course.

So I began Running with the Demon, fully expecting to quickly find myself wishing for a magic postcard to send off for the condensed edition. But in spite of (or perhaps because of) my low expectations, I was pleasanly surprised. The heroine, Nest, is a girl who can see creatures called feeders that exist to feed off negative emotions. As guardian of the park (it’s more of a forest, but ‘guardian of the forest’ sounds even cheesier) it is Nest’s duty to keep the feeders in check. She is assisted by Pick, a sylvan creature, Wraith, a mysterious wolf, and Gran, her ornery grandmother. The feeders’ attacks have suddenly become more brazen, and this is clearly due to the arrival of the titular demon in Nest’s home town. On the trail of the demon is John Ross, Knight of the Word, a man who is determined to prevent the dark future he visits in his dreams.

I do like that the meshing of the fantastic into the everyday world was kept low-key rather than taking the rather silly track of having institutionalized wizardry and the like. The plot was rather tangled in places, but resolved itself into a well knotted net by the end.

Test Drive: Kia Rondo

Due to imbalances in the cosmos, radiation emitted by soil, and other random factors operating to my disfavor, I find myself engaged in the unenviable task of shopping for an automobile. I would almost rather go to the dentist than endure a barrage of sales pitches. It’s not that I fear saying no. It’s just that my noes are more often than not interpreted as a suggestion to try harder. Now, I understand that people want to do their best at their job. I certainly don’t blame anybody for that. But for some reason when I finally do make myself perfectly understood, it somehow comes across as astonishingly rude. Needless to say, by the time that point has been reached, the entire exercise will have become a phenomenal waste of time for all parties involved.

Now where was I? Oh yes, automobiles. I decided that I did not want another four door sedan. So the first offering I tested was the Kia Rondo, which might be described as either a mini-minivan or a jumbo wagon.

The vehicle had some nice features. I found the Rondo to be surprisingly maneuverable for a vehicle of its size. There was pretty good visibility all around, and I never felt like another vehicle might be lurking in a blind spot.

The cabin seemed roomy and spacious, not only to myself, but also to my giant passenger. We found that there was lots of clever storage space in the Rondo: cupholders everywhere, clips for papers on the sun visors, a three-tier center divider with a chamber at the base for charging one’s mobile devices, and also some sort of purse hook or something on the passenger side.

The horn also had the cutest little honk.

However, there were a few important things that I disliked about the Rondo.

First of all, I didn’t care for was the steering. At twelve o’clock on the wheel, there was a dead zone of about five minutes. While this may help to keep some drivers from zigzagging all over the road, it might have actually caused me to start zigzagging. I’m just not used to having a dead zone on the wheel and found myself hunting for its edges.

One of my major complaints is with the gas pedal. It seemed as though it were more of a pushbutton than an analog control. In other words, press to go, press hard to really go, and let go to stop. This may work really well for racing video games, but it does not work so well in the real world. This vehicle was lurching down the street like Frankenstein’s monster.

Mrrrngh! Rnngngn!

As comfortable as it might have been, sitting in the driver’s seat of this vehicle reminded me of an office chair I had many years ago. The hinge linking the plastic seat to the base was broken, and it acted more like a ball joint. Sitting in that awful office chair was a constant balancing act, as the seat would tip backward, forward, left or right at the slightest movement.

Maybe it’s that I just wasn’t driving the vehicle the way it should have been driven. But even traveling down the freeway, which really didn’t call for changes in acceleration or course, this vehicle would gyrate like a seesaw bolted crosswise to a teeter totter.

In conclusion, while this vehicle might well be perfect for somebody else, somebody with a lot of passengers, I was not impressed. I fancy something a bit more sporty than this, something more stable, something less lurchy.

Twisty

Booking Through Thursday asks:

1. Do YOU like books with complicated plots and unexpected endings?

Yes, I do, with some provisions. I don’t mind a complicated plot. Go ahead and write the most convoluted time-travel
murder mystery ever written. I’ll read it. On the other hand, I do mind having to memorize a lot of characters. If I open a novel and find a “Who’s Who” of more than two facing pages, that’s a bad sign. An illustrated family tree is also a bad sign. Several trees in one book is a really bad sign. (Unless it’s being done as a Hitch Hiker’s Guide sort of aside that’s there as more of an interlude than a fact to be digested.)

Unexpected endings are fine, as long as they’re satisfactory in that they make sense and they resolve any dangling threads. In fact, I’d much rather find a (good) unexpected ending than a (good) predictable ending. On the other hand, I have seen some very bad unexpected endings. But I’m not sure which of these three is worst: 1) an unexpected ending that makes me sorry that I ever wasted the time reading the book, 2) an unexpected ending that creates more questions than answers (perhaps as an obvious sequel lead-in) or 3) an endlessly foreshadowed, belabored, and utterly predictable ending.

2. What book with a surprise ending is your favorite? Or your least favorite?

My least favorite was Iron Council. I suppose I can’t really explain why without giving the ending away, now, can I? My favorite was probably the short story “Impostor” by Philip K. Dick. It’s an old story, and so you might be able to guess the ending, even if you haven’t read it already or seen the movie (and for some reason, I thought Jeff Goldblum was in that movie.)

Skynet Dance Party

Sampled sound effects from the classic aci-fi action film Terminator 2 were reassembled together MOD style into this music video…

“Get down!”

Now Reading – January 10

Now Reading: Running With the Demon by Terry Brooks.

Just Finished: Permutation City by Greg Egan.

Permutation City is a story about one Paul Durham who may be a scientist, insurance salesman, or lunatic. Scientist, because he has experimented upon virtualized Copies of his own personality. Lunatic, because he believes that he was once one of these Copies. This story is also about one Maria Deluca, artist and Autoverse dabbler. The Autoverse is a type of cellular automaton engine that simulates a simplified physics at the atomic level. Maria is commissioned by Durham to design a set of parameters for the Autoverse which could lead to the evolution of life within its matrix. And then things get weird.

Permuation City has won several awards. The author later wrote another book, Diaspora with similar themes, which I enjoyed. However, I did not, unfortunately, enjoy this book as much as I was lead to believe that I would.

First of all, the pacing was funky. Act one seemed to take two thirds of the book, act two the remaining third, and act three, a few pages. I felt that, after a certain point, I was reading along just to find those few pages.

Next, I just did not buy Durham’s dust hypothesis. (Though Maria seemed to accept it, or at least the possibility of it being true.) This required just a bit too much suspension of disbelief to allow me to enjoy the story, though it certainly made Maria the more sympathetic character.

I think I see what the author was hinting at. That somehow the observer effect can create a self-perpetuating universe. That Schrödinger’s Cat might not only decide its own fate, but somehow decollapse the waveform of the exterior universe in the process. That our universe might not only be like a Turing machine, but might also contain multiple other universes depending on where the “tape” is started.

Interesting? Yes. But… I feel as though this story might have been more suited to a short story or novella, perhaps with the entirety of the first act reduced to a few pages of exposition therein.

Desktop Friday: Electronic Pattern

What’s on your desktop this week? I’ve got an abstract design, clearly meant to evoke the idea of what goes on inside of a computer, without being too literal.

I don’t remember where I found it, but I do remember why I found it. After stumbling upon one too many other WordPress sites that also used the Arclite theme, I decided that the New Year would be the perfect time to install a new theme. So I spent some time searching for the perfect background. If the above image had been smaller, less busy, and more tileable, I might have used it in my new theme. Instead, I eventually found my way to the pattern generator at PatternCooler, which is where the background pattern you see now originated.

Now, anybody know where I can find an online flourish generator?

Booking through Thursday: Gifts

The question has been put forth: What books did you get for Christmas (or whichever holiday you may have celebrated last month)? Do you usually ask for books on gift-giving occasions or do you prefer to buy them yourself?

Sadly, I didn’t get any books last month. I did give two books: a cookbook to someone who specifically requested one (on pies, no less) and Law of Nines to a Terry Goodkind fan. I don’t think I’d try to give someone a book as a gift unless I knew them (and their library) fairly well. A poorly chosen book could languish on a recipient’s shelf for years before being read, if ever it was.

Likewise, I don’t usually ask for books on gift-giving occasions unless I have something specific in mind. (Such as a pie cookbook.) It would be too easy for a well meaning individual to either give me something that I’ve already read, or worse, something that they would want to read. (Oh… Twilight. You shouldn’t have.)

Not that I’d ever discourage someone from sending me a book as a gift, but there’s also a small obligation factor. The giver is going to expect that I read the book given sooner rather than later, so that I can tell them what a wonderful selection they made. (Yes… uhm… it was… a real page-turner. Yeah, that’s the ticket. I just couldn’t wait to reach the ending!)

Don’t get me wrong. I have been very pleasantly surprised by given books in the past. I certainly wouldn’t mind being pleasantly surprised again in the future.

In Which A Movie Is Seen

So I finally saw that Avatar movie on Saturday in IMAX 3D. I highly recommend seeing this film in this format for the pure spectacle it becomes. It’s like a soup made of candy, and not just visually. Should you watch Avatar on DVD or even in a traditional movie house, the experience will be less than overwhelming. As other reviewers have pointed out, the story is a fairly conventional tale of industry-vs-nature, invaders-vs-natives, greed-vs-harmony, etc. There are no plot twists, just safely banked bends with warning signs well in advance.

I believe that if the story had been developed slightly differently, it could have come off as a witty inversion of all the clichéd alien invasion tropes— they look like us, they want to kill us for no reason, and they are no match for the common cold. Oh, and they also want to mate with our women. Well, some of them do. Okay, only one of them does.

The only other problem I had was with the 3D effect itself. I’m not sure exactly why, but the first few minutes of it made my eyes hurt. I must need glasses.

Speaking of glass, I think I may have noticed a trick used by the animators to avoid the Uncanny Valley. I suspect they might have used the breather masks to disguise the pasting of real footage of actors’ faces onto computer-generated dummies in some scenes, particularly the spaceport scene. But that’s really just my speculation, and I’ll probably never know for sure until I watch the “Making Of” bonus feature.

I believe that I’ve already shared my theory that movies come in pairs. For example, one year, there may be the Sitcom Remake and the Other Sitcom Remake. There may be the Action Figure Movie and the Other Action Figure Movie. The Pixar Animated Movie and the Not-Pixar Animated Movie.

I just hope that Avatar isn’t the Other Backward Space Invaders Movie, and that it isn’t the Other Telepresence Android movie… because I’d really like to see the Other Powered Battle Suit Movie.

The Electronic Replicant

Pretentious Blogging

Pretentious Blogging Meme: Part Two.

(Part One Of Which Shall Be Performed At Date Yet To Be Determined)

Desktop Friday: Moon

Now Reading – Feb 4

Test Drive: Kia Rondo

Twisty

Skynet Dance Party

Now Reading – January 10

Desktop Friday: Electronic Pattern

Booking through Thursday: Gifts

In Which A Movie Is Seen

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